Friday, December 5, 2008

SM: Data Crit

1 comment:

Ian Tirone said...

• rate overall concept from 10-1
• comment on the story structure (plot, rising action, characters, etc)

7-I think the plot is working, the idea of starting with negative things and then casting the tool for helping people with addictions in a positive light makes sense as a way to grab attention then persuade. I only wish that there were more negative things to have the build happen more, or at least switch the two negative things, because I think that is more of a build up, since the decaying person is a more gruesome visual.


• rate overall visual form/narrative quality from 1-10
• comment on how the story is told (visual quality, point-of-view, appropriateness, level of
creativity, etc).

7-I like the idea behind all the visuals, i just think they can be finessed a touch to make them work better. The first section moves nicely, but there black stick in the foreground is confusing to me. then the type isn't on the screen for long enough in either negative instance. the tar sequence is highly creative I think it looks sloppy and gross and great, but there are horizontal bands running underneath the word tar that are confusing to me. finally in the last sequence the sterility feels appropriate, but i can see the seam in the background between the flat table top surface and the wall, which breaks the illusion, and the white looks like construction paper, also breaking the illusion.


• rate overall use of duration from 1-10 (10 is best).
• what makes these durations good or bad (can you read/see everything necessary, is the pace too slow/fast, etc)?

6-The pacing of the movie from sequence to sequence is working for the image portions, I don't think any of them are on screen any longer then they need to be, i see them long enough to get the point or peek interest then they disappear. the only pacing problem i see is with the text. I couldn't read some of the negative facts, and the blue facts that happen with the cherry of the e-cig are a bit quick as well.


• rate overall use of motion from 1-10
• what makes these movements good or bad (appropriateness, character/quality, etc)?

6-The quality of motion for the image sequences works well for me, because the chopping motion fits with the time lapse feel of the decaying person, and then is a nice subtle carry over to the tar sequence, and e-cig.


• rate overall use of transition from 1-10
• what makes these transitions good or bad (appropriateness, creativity, do they overpower the content or augment it)?

5-the transitions appear to go jump cut fade in, fade out. I think the fade in fade out works with the idea of smoke and lucidity (for lack of a better word) however, I wish there had been more inventiveness with the transitions they seem sort of stock.


• describe the hierarchy of communication channels (image, text, voice, music, sfx) and their relationships. what makes the mix of channels effective or ineffective?

The text and image seem to share dominance for me, they each exist separately for the negative things in their own space then share screen time for the positive thing. so they go hand in hand. the music seems to take a back seat and let the text/image do the talking as they should. It does however offer lighthearted relief from the previous sequences and matches well.


• does this project attempt to break with convention in how it presents information?
- if so, what makes it successful or not in its attempt?
- if not, what makes it successful or not, despite it being conventional?

I think it does break with convention because many current anti-smoking things use a more mob mentality feel and bash the tobacco industry this simply gives a few facts then offers an alternative for those not ready, current adds don't take into consideration that people addicted are just that, addicted, they can't help it buy themselves, and they know its bad, so offer a possible solution already. Which Ryan does. Then is imagery is sort of a throwback to this is your brain this is your brain on drugs, with they kind of gross imagery, so it is breaking contemporary convention by looking to the past, which i think is affective.